Thursday, July 31, 2008


socialization and conditioning. we are the right, we have the truth, we follow the way. come visit with us, be assimilated into our way of doing things. flies to sticky messes on the kitchen counter. whoops, i mean noses to full blown, heady roses.

i am confused/appalled/repelled by my 180 degree turn. apostate.

on est tombé. no. i am the one who has fallen.

to the cold depths wherefrom i am unable even to urge, motion you, towards light and warmth. i grab my crooked stick, warning you away from that elysian utopie, when i should be strewing your path with large frondy leaves.

Thursday, July 17, 2008


waiting for godot is a vastly interesting play. it centers on two men who wait for a third, but that third hasn't shown up as far as they remember, and they've been waiting for a while. but they still wait. and wait. and wait some more.

in a way, the play is as depressing as hell.

but in another way, the play speaks very strongly to hope and faith.

i'm still learning to wait for godot. because sometimes the time isn't yet. it may appear to be now, but sometimes i just have to wait. i'm still learning.

Wednesday, July 09, 2008

glancing blow

my equilibrium took quite a hit.

i closed down as many ports as i could. i taped up the small cracks to prevent the wind from blowing through. i bought shrubbery to avoid the prying eyes.

did i recluse myself, hoping that in solitary devotions i would receive something of the divine? yes. and yea did i receive something indeed.

and yet here i stand, trembling, unable to decide. no, that's a lie. i made my decision, and i make my decision again. i just wish it would stick.