Wednesday, June 08, 2005

slow recovery

i don't think i've quite recovered from the experience with the other. we were together. it was intense. it's been over for almost a year. i'm with someone else, and i like this current experience.

but i'm still having trouble relating to the other. what to say, how to say, what actions are appropriate... i have trouble with a simple conversation. the other passed through town the other day, and asked if we could meet. and i wanted to ignore the e-mail/phone call. it's not like i want to get back into a relationship. once was enough.

but i can't treat the other like a friend either. we aren't friends. we are 2 folk, separated by some metaphyical mine field.

the other is moving to a nearby city. i'd like to be helpful, help the other move and all. but at the same time, i'd much rather not be involved with the other at all.

and it so doesn't help that i get the weird i'm-still-interested vibe! just makes me uncomfortable. i kind of want to lay the other out with a punch to the face. not because i'm angry. at least i'm not angry with the other. but rather to emphasize that we aren't together anymore, that that bridge has been burnt to a crisp.

yeah, i'm not recovered yet.


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